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| How long has it been?
*counts days*
Okay, you got me. I can't really count. (At least this is what my intuition is telling me.)
I've been having trouble recently trying to keep in touch with other people, as well as myself. It's like I have no idea who I want to be around, nor what I want to be around, and how to get around getting around to the things I want to be around.
Lack of motivation has always been a killer for me, and now more than ever. With finals coming up (One already past, and a whole course to learn in less than 24 hours), lack of motivation to do anything but game and sleep is killing me.
I don't understand how some people do it. How some people can live out the rest of their lives doing one thing over and over again, day in and day out. The people you see in their cushy offices living in downtown seem to be happy, being able to work at the same job for the rest of their relatively short lives. Me, I find myself bored after working a job for a month. Any job. Even teaching, which is always sort of exciting when I start it, gets boring after about a month, and I find myself depressed and hard-pressed to come up with excuses not to teach that day. I'll still go, of course, but being there in person and in spirit is a much different thing than what I'll actually do.
I'm starting to debate whether going into Engineering was a good choice for me. Sure, it'll help me out in the future, but at the rate I'm going, by the time I graduate I'll be nothing more than a hollowed out shell of what I used to be. Working at a job that'll kill me over time isn't my idea of fun. But what choice do I have? I'm sitting at home studying (not) for the set of finals that will bring about the close to a second year of engineering. I can't just throw an entire two years worth of education and money away. But at the same time, I can't bring myself to continue doing stuff where I can honestly say I have no idea what's going on. And even if I were to drop out of engineering, what am I going to do? Take something enjoyable in the meantime, and suffer for the rest of my life trying to make ends meet? Hell, what do I even enjoy these days? I don't even remember the last time I took a class in something that I truly enjoyed doing. Even in high school, I couldn't take anything that would be outside of a core curriculum because of the IB program. Just about everything major I've done in life so far was for this. But now, I'm having serious second thoughts about it.
What if it wasn't the right choice to make? What do I do then?
What the hell am I supposed to do?
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Oh well, back to studying Laplace and Fourier transforms.
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| Jeez, first post in a while. Nice to know that almost noone reads this blog anymore, but for 1 footprint this week.
"This week" would have started either today or yesterday, so thanks, whoever visited.
As of right now, I'm typing this up in a hostel in San Francisco. I'm on vacation (and have been since August 30th) with my brother here, and it's been a blast so far.
I must say, San Francisco is a very different city from what Calgary is. For one, the downtown roads, which we've been roaming a lot since we got here, are very unorganized at times. I swear, one intersection consists of 6 roads converging together, which causes a lot of chaos in road and pedestrian traffic. "Is it my turn ye- Oh, it isn't. *cry*".
Another huge difference in roads is the hilliness, if I can call it that. My GOD, is it hilly out here. Just coming out from our hostel, two directions that we can take carry us downhill, and another direction is flat for a block, then takes a nice curve upwards. It's insane.
With the hilliness (Is that a word? I need to look this up...) (Oh wow, it is a word, I just looked it up.) comes a lot of walking. And I mean a LOT of walking. It's one thing to get a stretch of street in Calgary downtown, walking from block to block. It's another thing to take that same street and throw in some random uphills and downhills on the way. It's a freaking hike to get to the one convenience store that Alex likes to buy stuff from (Because it's the cheapest there), which would only be a minor inconvenience where it located in Calgary.
All of this, of course, leads me to believe that we should be taking a taxi everywhere.
I've found that San Francisco is pretty big (food-wise) on two things: Crepes and sourdough bread. A small strip on Fisherman's Wharf serves up clam chowder inside sourdough bread bowls, and a number of other places serve traditionally non-sourdough goods with sourdough bread (i.e. sourdough pizza, which we still haven't tried, but will do so eventually. More on that later.) I kind of understand how it is with sourdough, since it does go well with chowder, and if you think it goes well with chowder, I'm pretty sure people will start using it with other things as well.
What I don't get, however, is the connection San Francisco has with crepes. I see at least one crepe place in most large gatherings of shops (Even one of the piers has a crepery on it), and a lot of them are surprisingly good, for being dingy shops and whatever. I don't get the connection, though: It doesn't seem like there's a French quarter or anything like that, and there isn't much of a connection though.
I'm not complaining or anything, the crepes are still a welcome meal.
It's been great putting down stuff into a blog again, though I should probably get Facebook to get in contact with people, since there's no MSN Messenger to talk with people. Meh.
I should really get in the habit of updating this blog more, but I never find anything to talk about, and whenever I do, I find that my words don't describe it half as well as I thought it out in my head.
BUT ANYWAYS
Ciao. | | |
| My job is slowly killing me.
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| I find myself absolutely bored, with almost nothing to do these days.
Normal students, having finished school and whatnot, would be seeking a job, or would be planning an extensive roadtrip to Las Vegas to get some gambling done. Or, they would be heading abroad with their friends or family to see the sights and sounds of the world.
Me?
I've taken up Lizst's Hungarian Rhapsody #2, and hope to have memorized/played it through WELL enough for my standards, by the end of the spring/summer break. (i.e. By September.)
kthxbai~
EDIT: Entertainment link:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6204903272262158881
Warning: Lots of foul language.
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| Although I forgot to mention that there was a CYO concert yesterday ('twas a great success, but nevertheless: OOPS), you can still catch some great music performed by a great youth group. This upcoming concert, we're cutting out our Beethoven symphony, but you can still hear us performing the Dvorak's Symphony No. 5 "From the New World". Great piece of music, although I still like to say we suck at doing it. You can catch us this Sunday playing this wonderful piece of music so craptastically.
Tickets are available at the concert hall, which is the Leacock Theatre in Mount Royal College. They're like 12 bucks each, and the concert starts at 7:30.
The Conservatory String orchestra will also be performing at this concert, and I have no idea what they're bringing to play. Something epic, probably. =D
kthxbai~
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